Memories
by Amarylle
Summary: Hermione Granger's magic and memories are taken away by Sirius Black in his quest to reconnect with the way he felt when James and Lily Potter were still alive. Who will aid Sirius in his ridiculous plan for inspiring Harry to fall in love with Ginny Weasley? Will Hermione ever remember who she really is? Will anyone help her? Pairings undecided.


**Disclaimer:** The wonderful world of Harry Potter and the canon characters belong to J. K. Rowling, and I am only borrowing them to write for fun, without any intention of profiting from it. I thank this talented lady for blessing us with such a rich ground to build up our creativity on.

* * *

Hermione Granger pressed her body against the wall, her heart beating erratically as she hid from the person she had once considered a mentor and a friend. She grabbed onto her wand tightly, forcing herself to remain as calm and collected as she possibly could.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are, Kitten," a low voice teased. "You know well enough that you can never hide from me," Sirius Black chuckled as he leaned against the entrance door of his library.

The curly-haired witch shuddered knowing that he was right. She squared her shoulders and stepped into the dim light of the room. "Why are you doing this?" she asked, her voice hard and unforgiving.

Sirius closed the distance between them and smiled. "Don't sound so disheartened, love, it's nothing personal," he explained as he twirled a lock of her hair around his finger. "I rather like you, after all. It's really unfortunate that you and your pretty face are ruining all my plans."

Hermione's eyes were blazing with anger. She shoved his hand away, but the wizard easily grabbed her wrist and, quick as flash, traced a sequence of runes onto her skin. "Don't touch me!" she hissed, pressing the tip of her wand into his stomach.

Sirius did the unexpected and laughed in her face. "Go ahead, Kitten," he encouraged her. "Do your best," he grinned. "Or worst, I suppose, it's all a matter of perspective," he hummed, activating the runes on her inner wrist.

The brunette witch was about to fire a spell when her breath had caught in her throat and she paused, her eyes widening in alarm and shock. "What have you done?" she whispered in fear as she was unable to touch her magical core.

"Come on, Kitten, we've been through this before." Sirius sighed. "I can't allow you to keep your magic when you're so _troublesome_. Those first few times I simply bound your powers, but you just had to be stubborn, didn't you? This time I'm not taking _any_ chances."

"You're insane!" Hermione said, her eyes shining with unshed tears. "Harry will never forgive you for this."

Sirius' eyes softened at the mention of his godson. "Oh, but I'm doing this for Harry, Kitten," he gently caressed her cheek. "He can't have a wandering eye when his perfect soulmate is right within his reach."

Hermione was numb. She simply could not process the fact that she was losing her magic because Sirius Black thought Harry fancied her. "Don't be ridiculous," she shook her head in denial. "Harry has a crush on Ginny, not me."

"Good," the older wizard smiled wistfully. "That's very good, Kitten."

"Then, don't you think what you're doing is an extreme overreaction, considering Harry likes the witch you apparently want him to like? Not to mention _illegal_ ," the brunette witch frowned. "My person shouldn't be an issue."

"No, it shouldn't, but it will be," he sighed. "I might have missed out on Harry's childhood, but I still know my godson, and you're always the one he turns to. He trusts you the most. It's only a matter of time before he realizes, if he hadn't yet, that you're actually a girl, and a pretty one at that, and then where would my plans be?"

Hermione folded her arms in front of herself to keep herself from shivering. She felt a chill running down her spine that she knew wasn't because of the temperature of the room. She took a deep breath and looked at Sirius. "Plans?"

The wizard grinned jovially and nodded. "I might as well tell you all about them, Kitten, seeing as you won't remember."

The fifth year Gryffindor witch's stomach churned uncomfortably at hearing that. "Won't remember?" she echoed, her voice but a barely audible whisper.

"Well, you can't retain knowledge of the magical world when you don't have magic to draw upon. You'll be safer in the muggle world, Kitten," he gently explained. "As much as we tried to make navigating our world smoother for Lily, she always felt the strain of the prejudice our society has against your kind."

Hermione paled. " _My kind?_ "

"Oh, don't look at me like that, Hermione! I don't have anything against muggleborns, silly witch. I'm merely stating facts. As cold as your reality may be, our world is not as progressive as Dumbledore and certain families wish it would be. Our laws and traditions we live by are rather archaic."

"I noticed," the brunette scowled.

"Hush now," Sirius waved her off. "Where was I?" he asked himself. "Ah, yes, I was the biggest supporter of James' and Lily's relationship. I witnessed, first hand, the hardships they had to face just to be together. They had to fight tooth and nail, and play a sharp game of wits to keep their heads above water. James had lost the Potter family some allies with his alignment with a first generation magical, and his word suddenly weighed less in political matters. He lost some of the prestige his family name had carried. There was a high price he paid for love, for loving Lily."

Hermione's eyes were blazing again. "What price he paid, it was worth it, Sirius, it was _worth_ it. Their love was poured into _Harry_ , and I'm certain that James and Lily Potter loved their son more than _you_ will _ever_ know," she hissed with passion.

Sirius' eyes flashed dangerously. "You have no right to lecture me on the love _my_ best friends shared, Kitten. I was right beside them, _you_ weren't, so don't act like you know more about it than _I_ do," he sneered. "And don't you fucking dare to presume that you know anything about me!"

Hermione snorted. "Presume?" she chuckled sadly. "Oh, I don't presume, I _know_ , Sirius. I finally understand that Azkaban did more damage to you than we all thought."

Sirius' temper flared, and he pushed Hermione hard against the wall, holding her wrists high above her head. "You better be careful of what you say, Kitten," he hissed.

Hermione was shaking with fright. Sirius' reaction had scared her, but she knew that she could not back down, she had to say the words, she was a Gryffindor for a reason, after all. "Why?" she asked. "Why would I have to be careful? Because you'll hurt me otherwise?" she whispered.

Sirius' lips curled into a twisted smile. "Hermione, I might not be a Death Eater, but I'm still a Black. The House of Black is infamous for their efficiency in Dark Magic."

The brunette witch stared at the man, and swallowed as the direness of her situation dawned on her. She didn't have an ounce of magic to call upon to defend herself, she was nothing more than a Squib, or a magicless muggle. Oh, how Malfoy would gloat if he saw her now.

"Are you scared, Hermione?" Sirius softly asked, his grey eyes boring into her honey coloured orbs.

Hermione contemplated lying to him, but she quickly realized that would be pointless as she was shaking like a leaf. "Yes," she breathed.

"Good," he smiled.

" _Good?_ " Hermione echoed.

"Indeed," he easily agreed. "Being scared of me will stop you from acting recklessly. As I had previously told you, I'm rather fond of you. I wouldn't fancy hurting you, Kitten, but I definitely will if you force my hand."

Hermione averted her gaze, fixing it on her shoes. She had the urge to cry, but she didn't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing her defeated. Her body, however, seemed to have betrayed her will, as a few errant teadrops had trailed down her cheek.

Sirius Black was unsettled when he realized Hermione Granger was crying, and internally winced at that. He did _not_ intend to traumatize the poor witch, but it was necessary that she was aware that he was the one calling the shots.

The tall wizard loosened his grasp on Hermione's wrists, letting her hands drop to her side, and awkwardly pulled her into his arms.

"Look, I'm sorry that it had to come to this, Kitten, but I have to do this. For Harry," he whispered, desperate for her to understand. "And for _you_ , really, your life will be better in the muggle world. You'll be able to live with your parents, go to a school where your intellect will be treasured rather than questioned, ridiculed, or feared. You'll be able to have friends who don't come with life-threatening situations attached to them, and you won't be hunted for being who you are. You'll be safe, and that's something that I know Harry will understand."

Hermione's heart was breaking at his words. She placed her hands on Sirius' chest to push him away, but he tightened his arms around her waist. She wanted to violently tear herself away from him, but she felt an all-encompassing numbness that halted her movement. "Don't act like you care about me," she quietly said. "You stole my magic away, you're taking my best friend away, you don't have to make up words to justify your actions. I get it, I'm a nuisance to you, and people like you, so don't stand here with your arms around me like you're doing this for my sake," she sobbed into his chest.

"I do care," Sirius sighed, withdrawing from her, and running a hand through his hair. "I want Harry to experience the love James and Lily had, and I'll do everything in my power to make that happen. Ginny's perfect for the role of his Soulmate, you'll _see_ ," he said with a mad gleam in his eyes.

Hermione shook. "You can't force them to fall in love with each other just because you believe it's the right path for them. That's not right," she hysterically said.

Sirius pretended not to hear that remark. "Just you wait, Hermione, Harry and Ginny will be exactly like James and Lily, and I'll have a place in this world again."

Hermione froze and her gaze snapped to his face. "Is that what this is about?" she sharply asked.

Sirius was startled by her oddly honed question. "What do you mean?" he narrowed his eyes.

"Are you doing this out of some wistful sense of nostalgia?" Hermione asked incredulously. "Do you really want to relive the good 'ol days desperately enough to pretend like Harry is James and Ginny is Lily? That's nuttier than a pile of squirrel shit!" she exclaimed, her usual filter absent, which all things considered was not surprising.

"Kitten," Sirius spoke in a low tone that had an edge to it. "What have I told you about not presuming things?" he warned, but her accusation made him feel an uncomfortable tingle at the back of his mind.

Hermione swallowed hard, but tilted her chin defiantly. "You've told me not to," she quietly said. "But Sirius, you have to realize that what you're doing is not healthy. I'm certain that Lily and James were wonderful people, and I heard that Harry resembles his father rather a lot, but he's _not_ James. Harry has Lily's eyes, and I'm quite sure that some of his personality traits are similar to hers. Furthermore, I can only assume that your fascination with Ginny being Harry's perfect Soulmate comes down to her shiny ginger hair. That does _not_ sound reason enough to force a love connection on two young people who still have plenty of time to work out, on their own terms, whether or not they have something genuine between them."

"Hermione!" Sirius growled, his temper flaring again as he backed her into the wall once more.

The brunette witch closed her eyes, her stomach tying itself into knots at the sliver of fear she was feeling, but she had to convince the wizard that what he was planning was wrong. It did not matter what happened to her after that, she tried to tell herself. This was for Harry, and she would do _anything_ for her best friend.

"No," she hissed. "At this point, I don't care what you may or may not do to me, I'll still tell you that this plan of yours is _disgusting_. It's sick, and you should seek professional help to help you deal with both your grief, and your experiences at Azkaban."

"Do _not_ tell me what to do!" Sirius snapped at her and leaned dangerously close to the witch. "You think I'm disgusting?" he hissed the words and forcefully grabbed her shoulders, making her wince at the pain. "You think I'm sick?" he continued his onslaught with a sneer. "What do you think about _this_ then you infuriating slip of a girl?" he taunted her, and crushed his lips against hers.

The kiss was anything but sweet. It was rough and demanding, overwhelming Hermione's senses completely. Sirius was punishing her, and when he was done with his ministrations, loosening his grip on her, Hermione slipped down to the floor.

Sirius licked his lips and gazed down at the delectable brunette with a gleam in his eyes. "Hm? Got nothing to say?" he teased her, as he crouched in front the dazed witch. "Who would have thought that all it would take is one kiss to make the Gryffindor swot speechless," he chuckled to himself, amused.

Regardless of the turmoil that was raging a storm in Hermione's mind, her expression was blank of anything other than unadulterated shock. She was frozen inside the chaotic swirl of her emotions, unable, or perhaps, unwilling to process what just happened to her. Even though the wizard had already threatened her and took her magic away, it was _now_ that Hermione really felt the peak of Black's betrayal.

Hermione's heart constricted painfully, knowing that her first kiss was stolen from her in such a disrespectful manner. She felt violated beyond anything she ever felt before, and she was at a loss how to deal with that. Her heart was thudding in her ears, and her hands were shaking. She had trouble breathing properly, feeling the icy grasp of a panic attack gripping at her, then everything went black.

Sirius Black was staring wide-eyed at Hermione Granger's limp body. He had expected the girl to reprimand him in that prim and proper tone of hers for his actions. He had expected her to react to him with that deliciously fiery temper of hers and test his patience. Honesty, he had expected a lot of things, but certainly not _this_.

He would have known how to deal with an insolent witch. He enjoyed the dynamics of a good game of wits, but he was ill-prepared for such a panicked, emotional response.

Where did he go wrong?

He leaned down, lifting the petite brunette into his arms, and flopped down to the floor, leaning against the wall, and holding her close to his chest.

Sirius was feeling such conflicted emotions. On one hand, he was beyond doubt that he was doing the right thing, and he felt justified for his actions. On the other hand, however, he couldn't help but notice the damage he was inflicting on someone who had once saved his life.

The wizard's expression softened slightly as he thought about Harry and Hermione flying on the back of Buckbeak to blast him out of his holding cell, giving him a chance to flee. They gave him the opportunity to reconnect with Remus, and gave him time to start feeling anything remotely resembling a human again.

His years at Azkaban changed him.

Gone was his cheerful and boisterous disposition, replaced by a dark and brooding wizard looking to reconnect with the past to feel like the real Sirius Black again. He clung to the memory of James and Lily like a lifeline, and he intended to do everything in his power to bring back the love, warmth, and safety he had felt in their company.

Sirius knew it in his heart that he could feel that way again if only Harry found his Lily, and in his humble opinion, the Weasley bairn would suit that purpose just fine. She even resembled a young Lily Potter.

He glanced down at the girl in his arms with a wistful look in his eyes. He wasn't ready to admit it to himself, but he was aware that he was attracted to the muggleborn, and his possessive feelings were partly to blame for his actions to take her magic and remove her from his godson's vicinity.

He didn't want Harry to fall completely in love with Hermione, because no matter the reason, that would not sit well with him. His stomach tied itself into knots at the thought, and he scowled. Oh, he knew Harry fancied his best friend, it was obvious from the soft looks he gave her when she wasn't looking.

Sirius held Hermione closer to him, and buried his face into her lustrous curls, breathing in the faint scent of jasmine. He knew that he should not sit here holding her like this, because someone might walk in on them, but he just wanted to give himself a moment to indulge in the brief semblance of peace her closeness had allowed him.

Sooner than he would have liked, Sirius pulled back from Hermione, and gently kissed her forehead. "I'm sorry," he whispered, and hesitantly brandished his wand, casting the spell before he could change his mind, " _Obliviate._ "

Sirius Black's shoulder tensed when he heard the familiar lupine whine coming from the back of Remus Lupin's throat as he gawked at him towering over Hermione Granger, wand in hand.

"Well, fuck," Sirius swore under his breath and looked at his best mate. "How long have you been standing there?"

* * *

 **A/N:** I've been working on this idea for several weeks now. I have a certain direction in mind for this story to take, but we shall see how it goes.

I won't do what I usually do, which is outlining the plot, because I want to keep you guessing, but I want to get a few things straight.

The story's beginning when Hermione is in her fifth year, and she's spending the Christmas holiday at Grimmauld Place. She's already 16 years old. I'm keenly aware that what Sirius is doing is twisted and fucked up and a several million other things, but I think that after spending such a long time in Azkaban, it leaves its mark on one's mind. So, he is not right in the head, and things that he wouldn't normally do feels normal for him. But he has his doubts occasionally, which I hope I'm writing well enough.

Another thing. I know that I owe you guys the next chapter in a lot of stories, I'm slowly editing them to fix things and that might take a while, but I'm promise I don't intend to abandon any of them.

Well, enough about me and my ramblings. Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoy!


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